Tamara (flaming_kitty) wrote in pinkandblack,

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An update

No one has written in this in forever.. But I created it so I guess it makes sense for me to update it.. You would think with the goings on that I would have so much pent up hate in my heart and soul... Blackness taking over all the good inside of me... Swollowing the love the pinkness of my insisdes... But in all actuality.. The only thing that I've gained is a new found respect for love.. The love that I've gotten from everyone when it came to what's gone on.. The love I got to experience after I nearly died.. The love I got to experience when my ex-fiance came into town and raped me. I was greeted with love and I didn't expect that at all. I want to hate soo much. I want to hate the guy who slammed into the back of my car and nearly killed me.. But I don't.. I believe everything that happened to me, happened for a reason.. I would love to hate Matt for doing what he did to me... But everytime I think about it... All I can think about is karma.. And I move past it.. It's still there and the ability is still there.. But I know he'll get his and in the end I am still the better person.. I am still me and the greatness that has become me.. And no one and nothing can take that away. It can phase it but it wont break it. And that is a big thing for me. And I hold onto that to get me through. Because I am better then what has befallen me. I am bigger then those who try to crush me.. I am me.. And there is no way to stop me from being just that!
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